Close to You...

I have firecracker in my heart that cause it skipping a beat, every time this eye's catching a glimpse of your name on my screen. I have butterflies effect in my tummy that cause it leaping into a non gravity loop, every time you're jumping in my thoughts...

And I'm loosing one grip of my logic, every time life bring me one step closer to you. Now I'm dancing through the space and time, anticipating what might happen next. Heaven helps...

#EarthEnergyConstellation

The Pitch Black, Yet Pink ME...

"​And even though I know how very far apart we are, It helps to think we might be wishin' on the same bright star... And when the night wind starts to sing a lonesome lullaby... It helps to think we're sleeping underneath the same big sky..."

Since the night after last valentine, this song is echoing in my head over and over again, plays in tune with the melody of my soul, creates a totally new rhythm within my heart, makes my mind refuse to let go the thought of you from my head...

This isn't anything new for me, I have been here and done this before, yet the question stays the same, as I look up to the sky and shoot the very same words above:
"Dear Heaven, now what...?"

It is like, I wasn't bled enough, as my heart brutally broken along the way to embrace everything I need to understand about LOVE. But this journey still needs me to carry on. As if the lesson wasn't learned enough along the way. Why...?

Yes, LOVE has always been my strength. Hence, the journey to embrace LOVE was also revealing my weakness.  As LOVE showered me with all its bliss and blessing in disguised, yet it also got me so cursed. Since this journey exposed me to the pitch black part of my soul... 

I thought my lesson in the quest to find True LOVE, has brought the light back on to the deepest darkest corner of my being. So I completely understand which part of my being needed to grow. Yet this LOVE for you still came and touched the LIFE inside of Me... 

Not that I am complaining, truly I like it. Since being in LOVE always makes me feel so ALIVE.  For the energy generated as I am fallen in LOVE, manifests like the dynamic yin and yang vortex. Gives my heart the sparkle of firecracker works, every time it skip a beat, as the thought of You comes to my senses. Just the way you send butterfly to my tummy only by throwing a silly jokes over the net...

Mostly the energy flies me too high into the multi dimensions realm over my soul, as my heart and spirit collide gives me the exact coordinate and clear direction, on how to intercept your soul... 

Sometime it's just lingering in the crossing channel between my heart and mind, gives me emotional turmoil that urged me to pick my phone and call you, just to fill the void, and quench the thirst of missing you... 

Other time it is even dropped so low beyond the twilight zone, sensing you were there on your own. Most probably lonely, but locked your soul in indifferent stage of being, where you find blanket of comfort zone, being on your own. The thoughts send me a wonder, how it really feels to touch your flesh and blood in reality. Sometimes I wish, you could at least give me a space to flow that feeling. But then I could only blow you good night kisses and send  virtual hugs, with a hope the big sky would kindly refrain them your way...

But above all, these thoughts and feelings, generate a high level of creativity while I am around you. Manifest in all the flowing texts I wrote, the words I hardly believe were 100 percent mine.  Because I believe You have pull them out with all the crazy thoughts we share, that some how energizing the think tank inside my head, even when you are not around...

This is definitely a brand new journey, even after all the ups and downs that I have been through along this kind of journey.  This time, It feels like I am standing in the middle of a multi-dimensional portal. Waiting for the most random leap, ignited by the energy we accidentally share. Each time our souls intercept, in the dynamic Yin and Yang realm, where our interconnection taken a place...

I really do hope, I have better Idea on where this journey may lead. As You said, I deserve the authority to be in control. How should I do that, You don't even have the need of me being around. The Pitch Black yet Pink ME, that plastering around you, like a storm thundering your comfortable sanctuary... 

What could I say,

I just wanna be with You...

#LovenLight

#GetaLIFE

#BeALIVE

#2TheInfinityandBeyond

"A whole new world, A dazzling place I never knewBut when I'm way up here It's crystal clearThat now I'm in A whole new world With you..."~ Aladdin OST

"Love is the energy that brighten the life and make those who share it feel alive. The same energy that pinned Earth, Venus, Mars and the entire Solar system to orbit The Sun. The very same energy that stick the whole Milky-way together, so none of the member move out to Andromeda even if they have to cross each other path in galactic collision during their cosmic journey..."

~ArifaH-2014

Kidung Keindahan

_menembus langit,_ _menyelusup bumi_
_menggempur hati, menelusuri relung nurani_
_betapa lembut _hatimu_
_betapa teduh dan_ nyaman mendengar kidung indahmu

ingin rasanya lelap mendengar nyanyi merdu ini

sesejuk semilir angin pagi
sesegar embun pegunungan
dalam geriap nyanyi burung menjemput hari baru

seperti gemerisik daun cemara
seperti segarnya tanah becek pegunungan
seperti gemericik pancuran bambu
seperti panorama alam

apa lagi yang bisa kukatakan untukmu..
tiada lagi.. maka kutembangkan saja lagu untukmu..

kukidungkan nada indah
kepada angin dan burung-burung
kepada langit dan pagi hari
kepada rerumputan dan pepohonan
kepada rasa yang memandangnya

kau dengarkan suara hati ini.. sampaikan keindahan ini.. semoga nada ini sampai seperti ini adanya..

salam sejahteraku untukmu..

~IBS

The Place I Call Home

People might see me as a weird package,  who's full of anomalies...  

Yet one of my valuable friends once  told me, the measurement of my normality should be counted based on the series of my abnormalities. If the LIFE inside me still feels like a collection of paradoxes, even for my own self, then I should really consider, everything is NORMAL.  It's really good to believe that.  Then I start accepting all my anomalies in seeing LIFE, as if I am born to create new pattern to live instead of fitting in ...

Embracing my anomalies felt like finding heaven is a place on earth, when few months back, I read my eldest girl wrote about my biography, for her English assignment. 

"She has a different style in almost everything. The world in her eyes is a whole different thing from what you see. That’s one thing I like the most from my mom. She always sees things from a weird perspective. But somehow that’s mostly what helps people... "

It is really good to know that my own flesh and blood is accepting me as I am. This fact really give me abundance of energy to face the future, knowing that I have brought up an open mind young lady for the tiny universe where we share this LIFE.  Moreover, this LIFE continued to give me even better  things to live with, when the universe allow me to start a brand new journey with you.

Last week,  I encountered a chat with the very person who helped me found my heart back in 2013. This chat made me went to sleep in tears, as if I have just dragged the darkness back. We chat about a Place to Call Home.  I guess mostly because the chat make me lost a grip of my balance.  As the morning comes up, and the first ray of my sunshine kicked in, I start to see a better ground.  

Even if the darkness was there, it is always our choice to maintain the stand, whether we will choose to stand in the dark side, or we will step on a higher ground where the light is shining. People might come and go to show us the twilight zone. Yet it is us who must learn how to keep the light on.  So we don't have to accept that anyone who come and asist us, as the only source of light we have. 

Especially for the restless soul, who's been broken and torn apart like mine. I thought I have been turning on the light inside me. But I was wrong, the journey still continued on. As I realized it takes abundance of brightness to bring out everything inside the place where my soul is scattered.

As I ever wrote in my blog few months back, after I went on a soul journey to Solo, Magelang and Ngawi. On one event, I met a long lost soul who showed me that I wasn't home yet. My soul is so restless, I still need a place to call home. This is also felt Like playing back all my own Déjà vu episodes, as I am collecting every pieces of my broken soul.

I wouldn't dare to imagine where this newest episode of my life journey will take us.  But where ever it might lead, I have fate, it will be worth the effort. For this journey really give me a brand new insight.  Eversince 

I start this journey with you,  I sense a high tide of energy is igniting inside of me.  The energy give me a glimpse of a silver lining brightness that is spotting on the road I am travelling.  The light that might 

finally show my restless soul a way to the very Place I Call Home.  

T

his should be my time to wrap everything up.  If all the truths I have gathered along my journey to get my scattered soul integrated are the truest truth, then I should be able to find it written somewhere in the road map you hold.

God provides me teachers from all over the planet, to challenge my truths and show me how to be a complete human. He sent people to allow me located my heart. He let others show me how to find my God Spot. He even sent many broken souls as mirror to show me how my mind, heart and soul actually wired. 

Now He sent you... 

I will never be able to thank you enough for walking this journey with me.  All I know, when we did something to help the life, the universe will smile at us and return the favor in the most surprising way. Looks like it is my turn to get the surprise, I ho

pe you equally get something good from what we reveal together.

As I begin to understand, no matter how close we are to an enlightenment, that allow us to use The Light Saber to slice into the depth of other people soul. We could never be able to slice into our own depth alone. Just the way we will never be able to see our own ears. 

We certainly need a mirror to get all the brightness around us reflected into the darkness we unconsciously keep inside. At the secret corner of the soul where we locked our deepest fear in a Pandora box, which is placed so secluded and hidden, even from my own consciousness...

May The Force be Upon Us...

So this journey will finally show my way to The Place I Call HOME...

Hopefully...

#StarlightSeed

#TheJourneyContinueOn

Embrace Everything about LOVE...

I had been badly bleeding,
as my heart had been brutally broken, 

along the way to embrace everything about LOVE,

yet the journey continued on... 

LOVE could have been my strength, 
as it is also my weakness,
the way LOVE showered me with all its blessings, 

after it got me so cursed...

The energy manifest out of LOVE,
flows like the dynamic yin and yang...

Mostly it flies so high in the multi dimensions realm 

over my heart, soul and spirit. 

Sometime it's just lingering in the heart and mind emotionally,
makes me want to pick my phone and call you, just to fill the void,
and quench the thirst of missing you...

Other time it is even dropped lower beyond the twilight zone, 
makes me wonder how it would taste like,
to touch your flesh and blood...

But above all,
the thoughts and feelings,
generate a high level creativity,
while I am around you...

Manifest in all the flowing texts I wrote,
the words I can't hardly believe were mine...

#GetaLIFE
#BeALIVE 

Something About Marriage...

People said :

"Everybody is not complete until the marriage,
to get married is about commitment
to spent the life together
and complete each other life..."




My friend ask me :

If a marriage is about commitment
to spent the life together and complete each other life.
Why some people are married
but think otherwise and do cruel things...??


My Answer :

Because it takes two to marry,
and it takes a lot more than that
to make marriage worked...

Also there's always the temptations
and some people around
that may hi-jack the marriage journey...

And as some people think,
all people have the right
to be happy and feel ALIVE..

Sometime it's very hard to stay married and feel Alive,
especially when marriage suck The Life out of You,
instead of complete Your Life...

















That's why some people Need to Make 'The Change'
and think that They 'Really' need Something New in their Life
to prevent them from 'Dying Inside'...

You can not claim this kind of effort Cruel,
because they just refuse to be buried Alive...

Only sometime it's so hard
to find 'The Right Way'
for getting out of this situation...

And to make things even uglier,
some people who received the SOS signal
tend to take this for granted,
and reacted to it just for fun or worse...

But The Best Thing in Life is, God Never Falls Asleep...
He answer every Pray and Cry for Help that People Send
And Give 'The Right Way Out' for them...

All The Kids are Gifted...

There's no such gifted kids,
because they are all gifted...

We just have to reveal,
which gift that each of them have...

Connect and activate that Gift to their life
That's Our Challenge as Parents...

We can't really help them there
Unless we already have our own gift
connected, activated and integrated
in Our Lives...

Where are we...???

Heart of Mine...

"Sometime I just can't help but wonder,
If I could stop the hands of time..."|
~Bobby Caldwell

Heart is an awesome place...
It can be as deep as the ocean
and as wide as the sky...

Especially when you have special feelings growing there...

I can not control my heart on what I feel
I may only have control on what I'm gonna do about my feeling...

And for myself,
Because I don't really know how to control my heart
I must watch carefully every situation coming,
which potentially put me in a difficult condition,
by learning from every life lesson everyday...























"Oh Heart of Mine..."

That Love is Mine, Hopefully...

Love is around us to share,
but not to claim..

If at some point love claim the life,
then it is no longer love..

For love come to build the life,
never to destroy it..

Love is always enough for love
Human tends to complicate it
with too many senses emotionally..

Let's Choose Never Stop Growing

Life is so full of choices...

Choose to live the way We need it
Let people around Us learn and grow with Us
As We grow with them...

None of Us should stop growing
Let's live fully and be very much alive
Because We worth it...

So We can love the life with full intensity
and live it with full capacity...

Learn from Our Presence and Absence...

There is some point in life
when We really need to be disappeared...

So people can learn from Our Absence,
and appreciate Our Presence more...

Then they know...
that they should never leave Us alone
nor let Us down...

And eventually We can smile brightly
because finally Our feeling is matter for them...

Note for My Beloved Daughter in Her Birthday

by Arifah Handayani on Friday, January 27, 2012 at 11:13am

"For the loveliest teenage in the world...
My Dear Daughter Netta Seven-e
Happy 12th Anniversary...

Another year is added to your age
May God always add His Perfection in Your Life beautifully

Another year is reduced from your lifetime
May God always give Brightness to see all His Plan for You

So, there will never be a day wasted
Every single second that flies will give you meaning
As the lesson for the next journey
which can open all the secret
of Your true role before God for the universe
The very reason you are created

In every pray I whisper your name
May God always be there in every breath You take
Giving color to your blood flow
Sounding in your heart beat
Echoing your step to every where you go

I just want to give you the best escort
so you can find your own life
the way it is written in your own life scenario
as beautiful as you dance through every minutes of it

My dear daughter, please note this...

Your destiny is written and re-write
according to the way You live Your Life...

So, live this love and love it beautifully,
for all the best plan the universe could ever provide You
May You get only the greatest episodes in life...

Never know that time can travel so fast
and You are suddenly Slipping Through My Fingers... "

Slipping Through My Fingers - Meryl Streep - Lyrics

Let Love Make Us Fly Far and High...

I will never crawl again,
asking for love...

Instead,
the universe will watch me fly far and high,
because I have so much love,
and I always learn how to love...

It will never be me,
whose lost the love,
for all people will want to be loved,
fully and eternally...

And now I believe,
love will always come back to me unconditionally,
because I deserve it...

Let's fly far and high...
Let Love be the fuel not the burden...

The Picture Belongs to Facebook Page :

The Most Beautiful Things In The World

To My Best Buddies in Life...

(I wrote this to all of My Best Buddies in life,
from childhood, teenage life, university days
and beyond...)


Because You are all my precious gift in life
I would not let time and space fade you behind...

Take this as words of love from a real friend,
for real friends are scarce in this stage of life...

That is why I took the journey to the past
in order to recollect all my best buddies...

Where ever You are...
What ever You do...

Please note,
that we are still friends
and always be
till my last breath...

Beauty and Evil in My Eyes

I can see beauty with my eyes close..
But I cant hardly see evil with open eyes..

God forbid me..

Because I always believe
there is beauty side
in every single human being..

Even in the most evil heart..

We just have to touch it
with a beauty in Us
from the most sincere heart..

Write to Me...

Please write to Me..
About My Presence and Absence..

As You know Me..

By Reading all which isn't written..
And Hearing all which isn't spoken..
In Me...

I'm waiting..

Solitude is Splendid

The great thing about solitude,
I can be with anyone I want..

Most of all,
I can be alone with myself..

In solitude..

I may find the clearance
so I get the ability to look in,
and take the journey to the inside,
for embracing the inner strength in me..

In solitude..

I have nothing better than
my heart and mind to present
all connected by the purity of my soul
when I felt You the most..

Packed and written
by all the words we share
while I have you by my side
together or in solitude..

White and Pure Love

White as snow even in the middle of the darkest night...
Pure and lovely as the scent of Jasmine...

Being loved so warm and true...
Can always rise one spirit up...

Where ever You are...
What ever You do...
Just by You...