I felt so exhausted and had a terrible headache this afternoon, this made me felt so lost. I have slept enough, had a full body massage, a beauty care and read books. But something still so tensed inside of me. It's like I need more ways to get relax...
Or actually I just need time to really cry...?
I hadn't allowed myself having anytime to grieve, maybe that cause this problem. Well, yes... That because, I always knew what to do. I did took loads of deep breath, and made a lot of plans but guess what...???
I felt tired to be in control...
I need a real deep chat, where I can just loose control and easily cry. So I will have some quality time to grieve. The inner me needs it. But as soon as the first tears fell down my cheeks, something in me start stacking bricks that recovered me from my true feelings. I guess my mind should stop telling my heart what to feel and allow me to sense what I really feel...
Dear me, Please allow me to be just me...
Please let me feel this, whatever it is...
Maybe I should've just started by saying...
"Dad, I've missed You...!!!"
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